Emotional Baggage
Posted: Friday, March 06, 2009
by Robin Newman
Robin J
Hands up all those who have dragged around their emotional baggage through the years.
I certainly have in fact if I had earned frequent flyer points with it I would have enough to be traveling the world.
Unresolved emotional issues, grudges, regrets, disappointments unspoken words they all come with you when you move onto the next relationship whatever level that may be.
For example you may leave someone who drinks too much and marry someone who doesn't drink but is very insecure and emotionally immature. The level of co-dependency does not change just the type.
If you have anger issues low self esteem issues phobias fears doubts or anxiety and you leave one relationship and walk into another thinking the person you left behind was the sole cause of all your misery then chances are you are going to be carrying with you a whole heap of emotional baggage.
So what do you do?
Unpack your bags see what exactly is in there. What fears etc have you brought with you?
What is yours to own what isn't? This is a very important question because often we end up carrying the emotional baggage of our parents doesn't mean we still don't have to deal with it just means it is easier to deal with when we know the source.
Another important question that needs an honest answer is
"What am I giving to my children my partner to carry?" What baggage are you yourself handing over and saying "Here now its your turn."
Do you always feel tired like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders?
Well maybe you are simply need to travel this world a little lighter.maybe you need to unpack and off load what isn't serving you at this moment. It is like living in a country where it is always below zero but having 10 bathing suits you know you don't need them all but you just can't find it in you to toss them out.
Maybe you don't need all those things you have been carrying around maybe just maybe they have become a comfort blanket of familiarity. Maybe they are in your suitcase because you do not know who you are without them. Maybe just maybe the thought of trying on something new terrifies you.
I am still dealing with the emotional baggage of past relationships those I had with my parents my siblings my ex-partner. I am not sure how I have managed to drag it all with me over the years no wonder I am so tired!!!!
Bit by bit I am unpacking starting to see what I have not dealt with starting to resolve the emotional hurts walk through the fears, starting to recognize the patterns within my new relationship that mirror the patterns of the past.
Lighten your load.you don't need all that stuff weighing you down.you are a walking miracle about to step into your greatness
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Top-level comments on this article: (2 total)Great advice but hard for most to fathom. Keep writing, though. Someone will hear the message!
Really enjoyed your article. When I tell people they need to look at their own actions most of them usually balk and walk away scratching their heads.Linda D
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